What am I? A failure, a hypocrite, a doubter, lazy, confused, un-disciplined? What do people call someone who’s failed. What do we call ourselves. I’m my harshest critic, but its ok for me to do it, I really love me. But, what about others and the way they act, is it there right to judge or give me the cold shoulder. Did I not show mercy and grace when others fell, did I judge. Doesn’t the word say don’t judge or you will be judged. I feel I didn’t judge. But Lord show me the ways I have. Why is it fair for those in leadership to act frustrated and use the same verses and same politics in every case of failure. Was mercy never shown to them? Were they themselves judged harshly when they fell? Why are they perpetuating the cycle. IM GLAD I FAILED. I don’t want to live life never knowing what those God has called me to minister have gone through. If people know there’s a call on your life, wouldn’t they want to get you fixed and back in the game as fast as possible. I’m not talking about quick fix that will later down the line cause greater problems. I’m talking about using wisdom, divine insight and action to know when the process is done. David and Saul never had to go through 2 years of restoration in Gods eyes. Where is the biblical basis for this? Is it mans futile attempt to create a fail safe for every situation people create to protect themselves. Or could it be that this very process was designed to completely humble and in some cases cripple those very people who have to face it. Some days it feels hopeless others it feels like its a process that was designed for modern day people to walk around for 2 years and be scorned as the unclean who have fallen. If leaders actually took a look at themselves and saw the plank would they change the process. Or is this process the repetitive tradition that was established by the very leaders who pioneered what we call the AG. I hurt every day knowing that I have 2 years in some peoples eyes to face before I can do what God called me to do. 2 hours of not being in your calling is enough, let alone2 years. What am I supposed to do, establish my walk, got it, but then what. We are all called to minister, but im being told I cant! Man has a choice, its that whole free will crap, I hate it; but with that choice we can choose to step out of Gods will. I chose, and here I am. But instead of getting mercy and grace from those who were supposed to be protecting me, I got it from the very ones I was supposed to be protecting. Does that mean I showed mercy and grace and preached it. What is the church doing? Instead of taking this new generation and listening to them, the church is trying to teach traditionalism in a variety of packages. You know what I got money that Christ Himself wouldn’t attend many of the churches around today. No matter how much the church visualizes Christ in a tunic and sandals, he’s not. He shops at hot topic, zumiz, pac sun, Mr. Rags…. Christ was a threat to the traditionalists in His time. And instead of looking for Him, they looked for the tradition. Is that what the church is doing. I tried a new church on Sunday and the pastor spoke of how Christ went to the temple to be brought in by the priests as the Christ. But no one was there, and when Christ died the temple was destroyed. Relevancy is a frontline issue in the church today. Why? Cause the leaders are looking for a coming King dressed in white and quoting AG polity and theological doctrine. But its not just the AG, I speak of the AG for that is my point of reference and my experiences. All that babble to say, what are we teaching a generation of great cutting edge teenagers who are ready to set the world on fire. Stop line yourselves up with traditionalism and processes and then go forward as so you may not offend anyone. Well let me tell you something. CHRIST WAS OFFENSIVE! He talked to a ho at the well didn’t tell her she was going to hell, told she needed to stop trippin. He extended mercy and grace and she became a follower. In a society where we sell out, fail and compromise multiple times a day, do we need another process. Do we wake up and go to our churches website to see what are spiritual alert level is, Orange today but hopefully it might be yellow tomorrow. NO, we must be taught practical ways to decipher what is healthy and what is not. What works for you doesn’t work for me, I need my own program, and it’s not the churches place to tell me what my program is. Its there job to help me understand how I can develop that program i.e. relationship with God to live healthy. But show me someone who hasn’t failed and Ill show you Christ. But let me tell you something, show me someone who’s fallen or failed and is still working out the kinks and Ill show you Christ. Christ isn’t in the health of a person spiritually and He’s not in the actions of a failure. He’s in the process before during and after. Whether we see it or not. But unfortunately traditionalism has sunk its teeth so far in that the process is now a process and has nothing to do with God. At best I’m rambling, I may even change my mind on some of these thoughts. I’m just thinking out loud. But who am I or who are you to say what is right or wrong, the only judge is God. What if mercy and grace were not just talked about but done? How different would the world be today. So many people are hurt by the church almost daily, so many are turned off or turned down because of a lack of mercy and grace. I never once read a part where Christ in all His messages told someone they were going to hell if they did not listen and put into action what He said. He gave them principles to live by to live the blessed life God wants to give us. He never said this is step one, this is step two… He gave us the principles, and then died so we could have a fresh start. Why can’t we teach that. ALRIGHT, IM DONE. I don’t even remember what I wrote but I hope it sparks some interest or at least was thought provoking or at least made you think I’m bitter and crazy, jk.
