Im so overwhelmed at the support we have received in the last 72 hours. To be honest sometimes ministry is one of the loneliest places. In moments like these past few days when we see a tsunami of support that literally leaves us tumbling in utter disorientation at the massive wave that has overtaken us, I realize just how much we are not alone in ministry, in life and in this journey. In the past 72 hours prayer networks for Judah have sprung up in India, Africa, Switzerland, Canada, Croatia, Turkey, Ireland, Italy and the US. There is such a peace that comes knowing and hearing story after story of how God has healed a child or loved one with a severe medical condition. But, I must say that the greatest encouragement came when a few people started to point out the impact that Judah has already had across countries and continents.
I cant place my finger on the moment the realization hit me that I want people who I lead, love and live life with to be better than me. Its a daily driving force to pour in and push the people in my life to be the best and engage their full Christ created potential and walk in the fullness of that. Its got nothing to do with heaven or hell and everything to do with what the Word says, “life and life more abundant” not the idea that we would be rich and wealthy and never want again. But the idea that God doesn’t want us to live mediocre lives, He has called us to impact this world and change history, and thats not just something we heard when we were kids that was unrealistic at its core. Yes God loves us and yes when we made Him Lord of our lives He paid the price for our entrance into heaven, but our lives were called for so much more. It is this driving force and revelation for me that drives me and my prayer life, but even more my family. My prayer from day one was that Judah and Lily would be used internationally for the honor of God and the furthering of the Kingdom of Heaven. To hear that even before birth Judah already has tiny footprints on multiple continents and in many different countries excites me in an indescribable fashion. This is where my personal encouragement has been found. That in the midst of the Dr.s telling us there will be developmental issues and special needs in his developments, God is so big that He is already using him all over the world. See I find encouragement in this because prior event to the birth of my son God is already answering the prayers I have prayed over Judah.
On that same exciting note Judah also had one of the greatest baby showers ever. As the baby shower wound down Sat. a contingent of women stayed and gathered around my wife and began by laying the open word of God on her stomach. The moment that happened my wife said Judah began to literally move like crazy. I can only imagine Elizabeth would know what that would feel like when John the Baptist was baptized in the Holy Spirit in His mothers womb. As the ladies began to pray there was a women who stepped out and began to lay hands on and pray over Judah. It was at this moment that my wife said she felt a quivering in her stomach and in this moment felt a sense of such strong peace that Judah has indeed been healed that she believes whole heartedly that he is in fact completely healed. Even days later she believes that he is healed and her prayers have gone from petitions to praise thanking God for healing Judah.
I have to be honest Im struggling with my faith. Not my faith in God or His ability to move but how to navigate this situation. I want to believe Judah is healed and I believe whole heartedly that God is indeed capable of healing people. In over a decade of youth ministry I have watched God heal deaf ears, aids, legs, shoulders and so much more. I know He’s capable. I have also seen how my Aunt who passed a few years back from cancer was prophesied over that she was healed and prayed for healing, but still died. Im left in this tug of war of having faith but trying to prepare for whatever Gods will is. His will is what Im after because its good and perfect. I believe with all my heart that no matter the outcome that Judah is healed and will be a testimony that will resound around the nations. I feel like my faith is week because I keep confessing with my mouth and believing with my heart but my mind is constantly trying to prepare for other outcomes. I feel like Im fake, that if I truly believe that Judah is healed I dont even need to pray anymore or like my wife I should be praying and thanking God for what Hes done. I guess more than anything you cant have analytical faith. I understand that God has indeed healed Judah. I also understand that if that is not the out come that Judah will have no health issues what soever regardless of his medical condition and he will still be a light to the nations regardless of missing part of his brain. Or, I recognize that it could be just as the Dr.s have said and God is going to give us the strength to walk this road. Regardless of the outcome I guess I feel guilty for even thinking any other thought than he is healed. Like my unbelief can undo what God has already done. I guess more than anything Im struggling with the fear of the unknown which again is due to my analytical controlling nature.
Beyond all the thoughts and the potential outcomes I do have peace. And that I believe more than anything is due to the prayer support that has come in. We have even had people contact us to make financial donations to help with the travel costs and times where Dana will miss work. Again, I find myself so overwhelmed at the outpouring of support. At first we didn’t know what to think when people offered to help financially. But, coming from a place where, one we are in need of it and two if God is leading them to do it, why would we block God. So if your reading this and God has laid it on your heart to help financially then you can follow the below link to donate to our Paypal account.
Again we cant begin to thank you all for your overwhelming support and prayers. We cant wait to share in the excitement of what God has done when Judah gets here. We are honored to have you continue to partner with us in prayer!